Back-to-school Fans Gifts

'What's wrong with me? I like Back To School Day.'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'Court's in recess!'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Caution May Contain Nuts.

'I'm pretty sure I have a Ph.D. I think one came bundled with my new computer.'

"It's Labor Day! The unofficial last day of summer!"

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

"Back in my day, kids had a little respect for the law of gravity."

Well, wish me luck. Mom and dad can handle an 'A' and two 'B's, but I've REAL-L-L-L-Y got to spin the 'D' in math!

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

Welcome to Kindergarten. It's a list of school supplies -- I need pencils, a ruler, crayons and a laptop!

"Next, I will make the excitement and enthusiasm of the start of the school year disappear."

The Presidential Physical Fitness Test

'Used to be 'Rock around the Clock', now is it 'Limp Around the Block'?'

Did You Miss Me?

"This year, I'm starting school with a positive attitude! You have my word...I'm waiting till the second week of school to call it the worst year of my life."

"'My Summer Vacation', read by the author. All rights reserved."

You kids are lucky. The first day back to school is full of promise! West Fester. I say it's just full!

'Sorry I'm late, miss. My alarm clock overslept.'

Did I cheat? You're not wearing a wire, are you?

'I understand the school has a policy of promoting from within, so I'd like to be considered for your job when you retire.'

The end is near. August. The end is near. August. The end is near! August. School starts (smiley face).

"I can't believe school starts next week."

"Baldo, no normal kid is excited about summer ending."

Mom on the First Day of School.

"All aboard!"

Newspaper Co. Sports Desk. Ernie, we need headlines for our series of articles on sports stars trying to revive their careers. Let's start with the Australian athlete. "Boomerang Thrower's Comeback." A basketball player bulked up to become competitive again. "Hoopster Muscles Way to Rebound"! The tennis star overcame a serious illness and is back on the court. "Tennis Champ Rallies: Makes Exciting Return"! The skier, on the other hand, had to retire. He's a politician in a dirty electi

'I had a good share and tell, Ms. Gibbs, but my family made me sign a confidentiality agreement.'

'I don't know about you, but I keep mixing up 'current events' and 'sex education' these days...'

Prefect.

The first day of school is always filled with crazy emotions. Joy and trauma. Triumph and failure. Frustration and disappointment. And that's just dealing with my cruddy new locker.

"Mom, if this is putting a strain on our finances, I could take a year off."

'I know school doesn't start for another week, but any chance I could just drop them off now?'

Why is Mum so happy. Doesn't she realize the holidays are over and it's back to school today!