Bachelor Pad Observer T-Shirts

Frog to other frog: 'Hey, nice pad.'

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

'...Please stop the...'

Living comfortably with electric appliances.

'Have you ever imagined a world without stupid hypothetical questions?'

Amoeba mitosis Divorce

"Everyone's so nosy. They act like they want to be left along, but they're always nonchalantly eavesdropping on everyone else....some more nonchalantly than others."

'Great. Now I'm going to have cat breath.'

'One moment, and I'll connect you with a service technician.'

'Let's see what's on the war channel...'

"I'd love to, but I have a million lonely ritualistic things I need to do."

"I could see my mating dance had caught her eye, so I put more energy into it, but I ended up sweaty and out of breath: she lost interest then. . ."

'They do have a dog next door but I've been assured he doesn't bark.'

'Uh, i'll pass.'

'I bought my dream home, it's a bachelor suite.'

"That's it?"

'Professor, Professor, the slaves are, I mean, the PhD students are revolting!'

'Justice delayed means more time for billing.'

'Look what the neighbors were selling!'

City of Round Holes welcomes you to the University of Square Pegs.

'Do you think she'll notice?'

'The carnival has a company car.'

'Create Adam before Eve -- He'll need some time to clean up around there a little first.'

The Day of the Great Parade - Ratapoil and his General Staff - 'Long live the Emperor!'

'I'm back in my skinny jeans!'

'I'm going to go get these carolers some egg nog.'

'It's quite depressing really: The students have better cars than we have...'

'Wet.'

'No offense, but this is a heck of an excuse for a bachelor pad.'

Estate Agent - '...And the area boasts a thriving on-line community.'

Class reunion of money and talent.

Bachelor Paddock.