Bachelor Lifestyle Observer T-Shirts

'...Please stop the...'

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

'I need to buy some gas, but I forgot my wallet. Do you have $18,000 on you?'

'Women, can't live with 'em, can't live without em.'

'What kind of...'

'I've got the iron.'

'Dang.'

"We've decided to express our concern for the environment by redecorating."

'Tele-barketer.'

"Living Alone - It's just plain fun!"

'Just so long as it doesn't lead to Math tests in church.'

Who wouldn't keep a footman?

'Thank you for another blessed year together.'

'That would be way embarrassing.'

'Okey-doke,'

'You just grew three inches.'

'What's the special?'

'crackle snap crackle pop.'

Deformed and damaged.

'You just go out on the lot and mark the tree you want.'

Cult films!

"Chips?! Oh yes, in the old days, we used to have chips almost weekly, but then, his girlfriend moved in."

'Everyone abhors a know-it-all.'

'I bought my dream home, it's a bachelor suite.'

'This could be a new record!'

'Dang! I have this nagging feeling that I forgot something.'

'No. We're having too much fun playing in the box.'

'It's not much of a treasure: No wonder you're still single...'

Superman Heads Back To The Fridge

'And to think I got a dog to help me meet women'

'he paid me twenty bucks to cut the brake wire on Skeeter's lawn tractor.'

"Let me rephrase that. Are you allergic to anything other than commitment?"

Interior with White-Liberal Myth