Bachelor Friend Pillows

Kissing booth!

'It's over there behind the...'

'You have to lose weight. Stop having intimate dinners for two, when you are not expecting anyone to join you.'

'My owner is a bachelor. May I have a human bag?'

'Is that a rhetorical question?'

'I'm going to be sick.'

Virtual reality mirror.

'I'm coping.'

Pimp your sex-life!

'Vanity plates.'

'What are you implying.'

'Just did a couple of laps around the pool.'

'Stand back.'

'They deliver all the free pizzas ion Friday.'

'Sorry I deuced in your shoe.'

'I invited some of my pals over to watch a scary movie.'

Christmas on your own

'He says some time between 7 A.M. and infinity.'

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

You're my Mona Lisa.

Killer Executive Suits.

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

"Talk nerdy to me."

"What's a patent?"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

LAY ZEE FUK

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "