Baby Einstein Starter Kit T-Shirts

"I'm starting him off with a little rope theory."

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

Today at school...we did algorithms for Quantum computation.

Constructing your own prison!

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.."

'I'm giving you a referral to Bobby Smith down the street.'

Proud mums.

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

"Might as well try and acclimate them when they're young."

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

'I don't think that lifting the remote control counts as exercise!'

"Excuse me, One has not actually signed the agreement yet!"

"Simple - the magnesium ion set among four nitrogen ions is the porphyrn responsible for chlorophyll. Any other questions?"

'Beginning Prodigy Book' - 'Lolly Builds a Cyclotron'

Mathematics

For years he had spent every free moment working on his perpetual motion machine. So far, he was up to 18 seconds.

Build up a lawyer

'Frankly Martin we were hoping for a slightly more radical response to the obesity epidemic than 'buy bigger pants'.'

"I'm looking for a rattle that both informs and entertains."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'Oh, Papa, look. Junior is taking his first step.'

"Both of you are rotten and hateful—from a kid's perspective."

'You're the mother and those are your children? -- I'd like to see a DNA test.'

'See! We can yes travel back in time!'