Awkward Teen Moments Collector Pillows

"No surgery. I'm just trying to hide a pimple."

Showbiz Awards

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"Don't get the wrong idea about those years in a mental institution. I was employed there."

"It was romantic during dinner, but now it's getting kind of creepy."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"You and your daft inventions."

The awkwardness of one's first officeplace fist-bump.

"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"

Sex Education Class: "Smirking or non smirking?"

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Monsieur has just ordered a vasectomy..."

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

Speed Dating Disasters

"Say these things, don't think them!"

"How embarrassing, I'm literally glued to the television."

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

"Are you blushing?!"

'By the way Adrian, it unfastens at the front.'

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

"Don't make eye-contact, don't make eye-contact..."

"Simple tasks were a challenge for Chad. Awww, geez. Another upside down spoon."

"Not wearing deodorant is not what I meant by 'respect the local customs'"

"Well...this meeting is about...ummhh...structure and...ummhhh...preparation. Well...ummhh...at least I think so..."

"Are you regular?" "Every morning at 6AM." "That's good." "But I don't wake up until 7."

"‘How is everything?’ Well, I don’t think everything is going very well … but my pasta is excellent, thank you."

'It's our first date. You don't know me well enough to ask if I'm getting enough fiber.'