Awkward Question Enthusiast Gifts

'So, how's Mom in the sack?'

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"God help us, it's that guy."

"All in favor of telling Anderson about that thing stuck to his lip, say aye."

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

Children's questions

'I always answer their questions with a question - it drives them nuts!'

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

"Stop asking so many questions, or it's right back to Books on Tape for you."

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"Tell me about yourself... what you do, where you live, the last four digits of your social security number..."

"Apropo of nothing, would you still love me if I were a sausage?"

"Rayna's been kidnapped! And its all my fault!"

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

"What do you mean I ask too many questions?"

'The school counselor says I have well-developed motor skills. Will you bring me a car?'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

"Is there a section at the bottom for comments?"

"It's that time of year when guys randomly explode."

Bob had a lot to prove – which happens when you're wrong most of the time.

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"I told him to trim a couple of inches off the middle and he thought it was a fat remark."

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"Ha, ha, wait … so Cheryl from accounting, ha, ha, ha, is your, ha, ha, wife?!!"

'Bill, I'm sorry to hear about your going into the hospital. Is it a MALE problem?'

'How can he have an attention deficit when he has so many nice things to hold his attention?'