Awkward Meeting Pillows

'I'm not sure I want to see you again, but just in case, I've backed you up on a flash drive.'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

"Pardon us, Harrison, if the board fails to share your enthusiasm for the foliage up in Darien,"

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

'The cow mooed, the pig oinked, the chicken clucked, I baaed and then we adjourned.'

Turtle Blind dates

"Well, we failed at pushing the envelope. Shall we catch Happy Hour and try filling the wine skin?"

"I never expected to collide into you!"

Is this the kickoff meeting?

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

'This is the last time I'm going fishing with you, Harold!'

"Oh my god. She knows I schist my plants.

"I rub my body with animal fat and swim around Manhattan."

'Sorry I'm late!'

Before birds and bees,

'Let's get some lunch in here. I don't trust my gut instincts on an empty stomach.'

Minimally Invasive Ethics.

"Your son has an unctuous, grasping, power-hungry quality we find unattractive in a five-year-old."

"I'm sorry, but I just never know what to do with my hand towels when I get nervous."

'En-counter'

"Why, Ed Phillips! I haven't seen you since our divorce!"

'...and bring a friend. If you have one...'

We can't call it restructuring,we did that in '98 and'97...

"Janet, we have to stop meeting like this. It has become a source of increasing friction in my marriage to Elizabeth."

"This time inflation really mean business."

"Ah, I'd give it a few minutes, pal. Maybe light a match."

"Goodbye and have a wonderful day!" "Ugh! Don’t tell me what to do, okay!?!"

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

'Mom, who are all these people?' 'I invited all the people you've friended on-line.'

"So, Carol tells me you're a baby."

"Well, I see everyone's coming to this meeting really ready to sit down and talk."

'What do you mean, we should join the men's movement and have a meeting? This is a meeting of the men's movement!'