Avoiding Small Talk Mugs

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

What price beauty?

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."

"The originator of the office birthday party."

"I find it a very good conversation starter."

Let's talk about the weather.

"Be patient with Ed. You can skip his political harangue in 15 seconds and move right onto sports."

'Have we met someplace? Yes, that's why I quit going there.'

"Jim is a good old-fashioned modernist."

Dadonomics

"I'll tell you what ... you mingle, I'm going to monopolize a conversation."

Why are you here?

'Is it just me, or is it REALLY temperate in here?'

"Actually, I don't consider myself to be a have or a have-not. I'm more of a have-to-have."

Friendly Fire: 'Good to see you, Geoff. . . wife and kids ok? How's the garden looking this summer? You're sacked!'

'Hello! I don't believe I've bored you yet...'

Elevators offer choice of conversation or conversation-free.

"I know absolutely nothing about that subject, but I will give you my opinion."

Harold Was Done Asking Customers About Their Day

Small Talk Outlet

'What are you doing at the weekend?'

Small Talk Lounge

"That was there to give idlers reason to not stop and chat."

"You want to know about my day? Mom, didn't we just do this last month?"

"We're perennials."

The Land of the Uncomfortable Pause

"Did you like Ike and all that?"

"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"