"Oh, the pain I can take—it's the awkward silence between conversations that's torture."
Masters Of Small Talk Avoidance Mugs
Explore our mugs designed for the masters of small talk avoidance—perfect for quiet mornings or coffee breaks that speak volumes without saying much.
Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'
"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"
"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."
Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.
"Remember, I want to hear fifteen solid minutes of small talk before you ask for the Wi-Fi password."
'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'
"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"
"Just this once, can we not talk about news or politics or money or family or relationships or children or friends or sex or religion or sports or culture or real estate or the past or the future?"
Snail slow to react to an ant's joke.
"Be patient with Ed. You can skip his political harangue in 15 seconds and move right onto sports."
He took every chance to practice his talk.
"I'll tell you what ... you mingle, I'm going to monopolize a conversation."
'Have we met someplace? Yes, that's why I quit going there.'
'With me and Dave it was definitely love at first sight. How about you two?'
"Actually, I don't consider myself to be a have or a have-not. I'm more of a have-to-have."
Friendly Fire: 'Good to see you, Geoff. . . wife and kids ok? How's the garden looking this summer? You're sacked!'
Small Talk Outlet
Small Talk Therapy
"That was there to give idlers reason to not stop and chat."
'What are you doing at the weekend?'
"You want to know about my day? Mom, didn't we just do this last month?"
"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"
What we talk about when we talk about the weather
The guy who's always pretending to know what's going on.
"It's just if the TV isn't on I never know where to look."
"You just watch him Ethel. He'll sit there and say nothing, just to annoy me."
"I'm terrible with names, and even worse with faces."
"Oh, no! People are coming to sit near us! Put up the banner!"
Party Overhead Signs.
Stuck in the Conversation Pit of Hell.
Please stop trying to engage me in conversation, Lars. Can't you tell when a wolverine is engrossed in a book? Sure, that's easy. They move their snouts when they read.
"Hot enough for ya'?"
"I've never been one for small talk..."
Didn't read the book, missed the movie, but caught the theme park ride.
Masters Of Small Talk Avoidance Mugs Collection
Masters Of Small Talk Avoidance Pillows
Relax with pillows that humorously acknowledge the joys of avoiding unnecessary chatter—shop our pillow collection now.
Masters Of Small Talk Avoidance Prints
Add a humorous touch to your space with prints that celebrate quiet humor and social preferences—explore our art prints collection.
Masters Of Small Talk Avoidance T-Shirts
Browse our range of clever t-shirts that poke fun at small talk avoidance and suit the quiet, witty personality.