Avid Thinker T-Shirts

'Is there a doctor of psychology in the house who can explain the deeper meaning of this play?'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"Mrs. Berg calls my book report a finely crafted debut and she looks forward to my next effort."

"Barb's such a fast reader."

"Did you ask for the large print edition?"

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

Death comes to both the Archbishop and the Salesman in Venice

"I beg to differ."

Dog Training. Most of the choices the dogs made for their book reports are logical. The labrador retriever chose "Catch-22." The terrier, who loves to dig, chose "Journey to the Center of the Earth." The basset hound is doing his on "The Howling." and the shar-pei picked "A Wrinkle in Time." But the dachshund's choice confuses me. Even with the ground-hugging physique, he selected "Wuthering Heights."

TV vs Reading

'Go and fish Darling, I'll be fine: I have some reading for the next few weeks...'

Virginia Foxx Caricature

"C'mon, Hillary – just answer the question!"

The Subtitle

Quite literary.

"Oh, that reminds me of this article I barely remember."

'Looks like a case of Reader's Indigestion. How long were you in our waiting room?'

'Oh look, Harold! It's the first Robin of spring!'

"Look Mommy, reserves!"

Your Luggage

Your library book is overdue.

Shop manager drives digger to remove persistent magazine readers

"Wow! Why do you have no tattoos?"

"Ah, the beach. My old nemesis."

The Seven Habits of Highly Obsessively Compulsive People

Harold Pinter

Bookmobile.

"Did you like that mystery book?"

Read this book! It will never be a motion picture or even a made for TV movie.

"Must you insist on reading like that?!"