Automotive Sales Professionals T-Shirts

'And when you press this button, the hood comes down.'

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'So, a bailout is like a Ponzi scheme for automakers?'

"Perfect."

Professor Freely's new alternative fuel source did have its drawbacks.

'And here's the toolkit.'

Electric car

Volkswagen Scandal

The American Nightmare.

A world choked with people mindlessly on the move

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

"And this dashboard has all the electronic distractions grouped into one convenient confusion cluster."

Frank and Ernie's Classic Cars. '40s - '50s - '60s. Hi! Do you have any cars with fins in the back? Sorry, sir, nothing with Fins in the back -- but there are a couple with Norwegians in the trunk!

"Tesla's founder Elon Musk launched his spacex rocket today with a successful pinpoint return to earth. . . General motors said it would rebuild its plant and start again from scratch."

SUV's Off A Gas-Price Cliff

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

"You have 24/7 roadside assistance to compensate for your new car's immediate depreciation."

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

'... Yes, that's right. It has had one careful owner and three not so careful owners.'

"What kind of mileage does it get?"

"This baby has it all. . . premium leather interior, 17-inch wheels. Touchscreen nav and bluthooth connectivity. Best of all, it comes fully optimized for vertical video."

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

'Is this a 'cash for clunkers' deal?'

'I see you've found a cure of the 'new car fever'.'

Autos. You can drive a hard bargain, but you may find a bargain is hard to drive.

"This car comes with a chiropractor who helps you to get in and out!"

"... With a slightly above average mileage..."

"Got any new monster trucks?"

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

OBSOLETE: Any state of the art vehicle you bought last week for mega bucks.

"I can dream, can't I?"

'It's a hybrid.'

Peak oil and the limited future of petrol cars.

"To compensate for the immediate depreciation of your new car, you get a year's supply of new car smell aerosol spray."