Auto Salesmen Gifts

CX916960

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

Another potential sale lost due to Ted's misguided attempt at humour.

Larry's used art

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

'It seats two comfortably.'

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

It's great for pulling the birds!

Mohammad's motors

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

'God's speed.'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

'Those are all highway miles. The previous owner was a pharmaceutical sales rep.'

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

'Do you have any of those cars with 'My Child Is An Honor Student' bumper stickers on them?'

"An enormous amount of advanced engineering has gone into our latest models. That's not to say, of course, that an enormous amount of advanced engineering hasn't always gone into all our models."

'It's too cheap, can I haggle you up?'

"Perfect."

"This electric car is environmentally friendly and will bring your family closer together."

"This baby gets such horrible miles per gallon, you actually save on gas because nobody can afford to drive it!"

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"It goes from the factory to us in $29,500."

'Hi, I'm looking for something small and portable!'

'How about a nice saloon?'

'And here's the toolkit.'

"Don't mix this up...I want a car with a moonroof. He wants one with a sunroof."

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

"Jerk." "Jackass." "Screw you." "Bite me."

'I need a lot of trunk space.'

"And this model features a nifty, manual back-up device."