Auto Repair Lover Pillows

'Have you got a car which goes with this?'

"Take me to your mechanic."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Is this for wiping greasy hands?

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

"Have you tried turning it on and off again..?"

"Good news...turns out it was just your battery!"

Car Dentistry.

You were fixing cars in your sleep again.

'...Plus $847.93 for replacing our front door....'

'Your car's ready, but drive carefully for awhile. I had to give the student an 'F' for the work he did on it.'

Support groups for car repairs.

Psychic Car Mechanics.

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

"Nap time."

"It's your oil.....it needs a new car!"

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

'A belt will have to be tightened...not the cars...yours.'

Acme Flyswatters.

Psychic car mechanics.

"It's a great Fixer-Upper and this is Ken, single, available and a pretty decent handyman."

When did you last have your oil changed?

'Any day now I'll fix the roof.'

'There goes the squeak in your brakes, Mrs. Ferguson.'

"It'll need a carburettor transplant, a right wing panel augmentation, and an engine oil transfusion... Maybe you should consider euthanasia."

"It's worse than I thought."

'School of secondary sex characteristics'

Shoe Repair and Pest Control.

'Oh I could fix it for under fifty bucks, but I just couldn't live with myself knowing that someday you might need a whole new engine.'