Auto Dealership Manager T-Shirts

"We were finally able to take out enough extras to get the car within your budget."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

"Perfect."

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

'I need a lot of trunk space.'

'You seem qualified. What concerns me is the car you're driving. It's not sending out the right message.'

'How about a nice saloon?'

"You know, maybe he's not the small-business man he claims to be."

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

"And this model features a nifty, manual back-up device."

"I'm looking for a car with backseat performance."

The sea of heartbreak.

"Now if it's a people-mover you're after..."

“Mileage is great, but I need to customize the leg holes.”

'Doctor, are you going to finance it or shall I just bill Medicare?'

SUV's Off A Gas-Price Cliff

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

"If you want to buy this, I'm afraid I'm going to need to see some justification."

TS Motors Inc.

"This new car is so smart, it wrote its own AUTObiography."

Wonderland Auto Dealers. We have some very satisfied customers. Humpty Dumpty loves the airbags in his new car! Hansel and Gretel are happy with their GPS. And the three bears think their security system will prevent break-ins. Goldilocks probably wishes the three bears bought something with keyless entry. The biggest complaint is from Cinderella. Did her car into a pumkin? No, this time it's a lemon!

"Don't let this one take any cars out for a test-drive!"

"In my experience, cars with hyphens in their names are the best."

99 Cent Store

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

'... Yes, that's right. It has had one careful owner and three not so careful owners.'

"... With a slightly above average mileage..."

"I want one that's going to fall apart. . ."

'Is it faster than a hare?'

'Power steering.'

'I was looking for something more passive-aggressive.'

"While our 'Haggle Apps' negotiate a price, let's go have a cup of coffee."