Audition Success Pillows

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'They all want to play the star.'

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

"In addition to 'loyalty' are there any OTHER qualities you think you could bring to the job?"

"Which part are you reading for?"

'I was up for a part in the Producers...'

I can't wait 'til her tryouts for "Cats" are over.

"Sorry, I meant to say "good luck", not "break a leg"..."

Presenter Auditions.

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

'They're only interested in computer generated mammoths.' (Theatrical Agent).

"Bob, you're just not selling me on you essential hamburgerness."

X Factor contestant dressed as a 'Y'.

"Well, you're certainly on our short list."

THEATRICAL AGENCY, 'We have an opening to do some commercials - How'd you like to be the LEAST interesting man in the world?'

"Sorry, dude. . . but you just don't fit into our group!"

"You've been offered a role as a husband who's been married for thirty years."

Casting Director

Ventriloquist Audition

"I got another callback. My agent says it's between me and the guy who's going to get it."

Bravo!

"A P.R. Intern Named Salome with the Head Shot of John the Client."

Ballet Audition. I think I've just witnessed the pollution of Swan Lake.

'To be honest Mr Gregson, I've seen better escapologists, goodnight.'

Very well, Mr Potter. I blinked first. You're hired.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've seen that move - Show me something new! Inflatable air dancer tryouts.

She's a natural.

"This isn't his audition...he's telling us about being an actor."

"Remember, you're a 17-year old fashion model. Now go out and act like you've never acted before."

'Congratulations. All but one of you has been short listed.'

"This is a blind audition, right?"

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

Graham really wanted to play Joseph, but deep down he knew what part he'd get again.

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

'Now here's an Actor with real gravitas!'