Audio Production Gifts

'And then for this scene of the great coconut march, we'll just record a bunch of horses.'

I'm a voiceover artist.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Showbiz Awards

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Lennon and McCartney.

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

'Why don't you ever look at ME that way?'

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

Cut!

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

'Good news. We're not Daft Punk.'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

Canadian film production

New music conference

'From albums to 8-tracks to cassettes to CD's...What a long, loud trip it's been!'

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

Buster Keaton

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

Little Red Riding Carpet

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."