Audio Fans Gifts

"When I said I wanted socks, I obviously meant I wanted a multi-room sound system with voice activated management."

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

'I was up for a part in the Producers...'

'What did I tell you about playing the piano in the house?'

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

Cave Paintings Audio Guide

"He had a request for me on the radio today. He wanted me to bring him a cup of tea."

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

Gramaphone Man.

"Now that's what I call a sound system."

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

'He's got a lot of talent and everything, but I just don't think he's cut out for talk radio.'

"Now don't let your concentration move from my hands and the cards. . ."

A clown combines music and soap bubbles.

Now that we can't afford heating oil our pension check is finally good for something.

Terry Wogan

Dirty Grazing.

Blues Night.

Jupiter

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."

'NEXT!'

Performer

"And now, our newest hit song..."

We successfully replaced your pacemaker with an iPod, Mr. Wyatt

Ant Mishbehavin'

Percy Grainger.

Hi Fi

'There it goes again,,,everytime I get into a good gallop,,,that damn music,,,'

Wow. Is your heartbeat in stereo? It's actually beyond stereo, doctor. You should get yourself a quadrophonic stethoscope!

"The disc jockeys creep me out, but you can't deny that they play great music..."

"People usually see the Virgin Mary in a piece of toast or something' but..."

Community Playhouse. Actually, live theater is always in 3-D. (Published originally on March 11, 2014.)

The Humpback of Notre Dame.