Attending Pub Events Gifts

UK bid to hold p***-up in a brewery championship fails.

"This place has the best happy hour."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Beers

Best Before 5th Pint.

You said you wanted beer with hops !

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

Goldie Locks and the three beers.

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

"Leave it you guys! We have this EVERY-SINGLE-TIME we go anywhere!!"

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

"I'm thinking of turning green..."

To tell you the truth, I find it hard to be sympathetic for the plight of the beer vampire.

Real Beer People

"Oh, my, I can tell—everybody in there has read Barbara Tuchman."

"They call me the king of railroad salvage - 'they' being my wife, actually."

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

'Just too many choices.'

'Bitter.' 'Anything else?' 'Yea - twisted.'

"Is it horny in here, or is it just me?"

'We can't go on knocking it back like this - one of us must give it up, won't you!'