Attending Meetings Gifts

"I can honestly say I feel really refreshed after that presentation. I slept all the way through it!"

Public Meetings: 'If you check the guide it's clear that you only need to say 'chair'.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

Sloaney Pony.

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"The meeting will come to order."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"I need to see your budget proposal."

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

"It's been moved that we adjourn for an afternoon nap. Is there a second?"

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

"Mr. Johnson, Bob is kicking me under the table!"

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."