Attending Couples Therapy Pillows

"Look at you—folding the laundry two days before couples therapy."

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

'I don't like to play the blame game, but if HE hadn't been born we wouldn't be having marital problems now.'

'He gets very defensive.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

Relationship Warning Lights

"Well, you both sleep eighteen hours a day, so try to coordinate this to find a window for some quality time together..."

She - Interpreter - He.

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

Two Rages Passing in the Night

"It's a major fixer-upper. How's your marriage?"

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

'She seems to think I only have one thing on my mind.'

Your Home Remodel Team

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

Duvet nailed to the floor.

"I suppose we should start with listening skills!"

'While it's often said that laughter's a better medicine, I've learned that crying is best in solving disputes between husbands and wives.'

'Have you two taken the COSMO 'compatibility test'?'

"See how controlling he is?!"

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

Express Therapy

Personal Relationship Counsellor

A woman thinks of flowers and a man thinks of a prison cell.

Richard and Wendy Kozier, of Saddle River, New Jersey, with U.N. Peacekeeping Contingent