Athletic Competition Pillows

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Football Fans

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Church for sports worshipers.

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

"Portrait of a Lady"

Brian was very proud of his dog.

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

'Your shoe's untied.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

'Can our software do that?'

'Another football scholarship offer?'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

Yearbook

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."