Astronomer Gifts

"Look, a shooting star- let's critique it!"

Beagle II not responding.

"This plaque shows nine planets, but their transmissions say their system has eight."

"It looks as if Bodecker's project has gotten completely out of hand."

"If you look carefully you'll see that all claims are invalid except on alternate Tuesdays in June and when Venus is in alignment with Mars."

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

Entropy Seminar.

'Are you trying to give me a heart attack??!!'

'Someday, Mr. Nicky Copernicus, SOMEDAY you'll learn that the world doesn't revolve around YOU!'

'Johannes Kepler's uphill batle'

In the middle ages: 'I believe earth is the center of the universe.'...Today:' I Know I'm the center of the universe.'

Embarrassing moments in asteroid tracking.

'The Big Bang theory of creation.'

Just before The Big Bang

'I'll be working on the largest and smallest objects in the universe - superclusters and netrinos. I'd like you to handle everything in between.'

"I've just discovered the universe is built from trillions and trillions of lego blocks!"

'Just checking.'

"Be realistic, how can lumps of rock zooming around in space affect our lives down here?"

Testing the Big Bangs theory.

"Hey Arthur, check it out, a shooting star. That's a sure sign of luck, my friend."

'What do you mean, you can't look at the Milky Way because you're lactose-intolerant?'

'That? No, that isn't a UFO. It's on the ground now, and you've identified it. That makes it an IGO.'

A microbe using his macroscope to search for intelligent forms of life.

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

All the People of the World See the Same Moon.

'Did you hear about Pluto? - He got demoted to 'dwarf planet' for noncompliance.'

'Bad news, fellas... it's inventory time.'

Rocket.

'The vasteness of the universe makes me feel so small and insignificant.'

"When I was your age, we wished on stars. Now, we wish on satellites!"

'I hope my grandma doesn't find out the world doesn't revolve around me.'

"The Big Bang Theory? I want to see you come up with the Big Bucks theory!"

"Another decade or so, and it'll be warm enough for us."

"Countless observations and calculations based on the scientific method led me to the conclusion that the center of the universe is not planet earth, but. . ."