Astrology Appetite Admirer Gifts

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

"The Chinese Zodiac told me to marry a sheep. Who am I to question hundreds of years of ancient Chinese wisdom?"

Planting by the Moon.

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

'Horoscope, stay indoors and keep your mouth shut.' 'So, no dentist.'

'We're an equal opportunity employer and we do not discriminate against sex, race, religion, age, or astrological sign.'

'My horoscope said I was going to make someone happy today.'

'Fortune telling/retirement planning'

The Inner Dog.

"So, what is your star sign?"

Devilled Eggs

"We're not compatible. I'm a Virgo and your an idiot..."

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

"Running of the the chickens!? This is crazy! Dad, no one celebrates Hispanic Heritage Month like this!"

Monster Horrorscopes

Alarming symptoms after eating boiled beef and gooseberry pie

"I used to believe in astrology, UFO's, reincarnation, ESP, and all that stuff - in a former life, of course."

"Eye irritation is quite common when Saturn and Jupiter are in this position. It's called conjunctivitis."

Kitchen - Sign reads 'Out of Hors D'Oeuvres.'

'Hors-D'oeuvre, Madam?'

Documentation Please

"Leftovers"

(Omi God! Pigs in a blanket!)

Fortune Tellers Convention

'Yeah, I'm a trife scorpio - what of it?'

"We're out of empanadas!"

Eve makes a discovery with far reaching ramifications. Our star signs aren't compatible.

"Oh, I listen to my body at meal time, but the messages aren't clear because its mouth is full!"

The four major food groups.