Astrological Adventurers Gifts

"We found three sort-of Earthlike planets around a nearby star." "Do you think any of them have video games?" "I've been trying to work out the odds of an intelligent species arising and evolving thumbs capable of holding an X-box controller." "Proof of video games would change everything." "I wonder what the aliens on those planets consider sexy." "Living beings creating simulated beings they can smash is the hallmark of an intelligent species."

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"It's true: no more burpees."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Needs to get a life"

Astral Projection

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

'This is way better than a litter box.'

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Halo Frisbee.

"Do you have an appointment?"

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

"Show off."