Assignment Avoider Pillows

'Can I hand up my essay on Friday Miss. My ghostwriter is unwell at present.'

"My Dad helped with my homework so don't blame me."

Student at bookstore advertising used books advertises used homework.

'Would you believe, I didn't get my homework done because of PMS?'

"I decided to procrastinate as soon as I got this assignment!"

"I did the laundry while studying. Unfortunately, my mom can't find the lost socks or my missing assignments."

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

'Before you give us your surprise test, could we have a surprise study period?'

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

Billy strip: help with homework.

"Shouldn't you be studying?

"I virtually finished my homework."

'I've been doing well in school lately, so I think I'm entitled to some dumbing down.'

"Oh, a resume is not necessary. I know all about you."

The Procrastinatorium.

'BEWARE OF DOG (eats homework)'

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

"I'll go on a cruise, but not if I'm forced to learn things."

"No, I'm not doing my homework, but I am watching a YouTube video of someone doing theirs."

'You're lucky! Your teacher never gives you any homework.'

'On second thought, dear, could you toss me the car keys?'

"I'm doing a Kickstopper project!" "What?" "I was going to write a book... but do we really need another book in this world? So... Kickstopper—people donate money to stop me from writing. I won't write it so I'll never ask you to read it. I'd pay money to not read your book. Thanks." "You're welcome." "I'm also starting projects to not start a band, not write poetry and not tell you about my dreams."

"I want to vacation where we can look at something scenic from some place climate-controlled."

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

"Yes Dad! I can see the ground way way down below very clearly! It's not unrelated to my reluctance to try flying!"

"Alert security, the buck has failed to stop here and is loose in the building."

"Hahahaha! Oh, you are hilarious! Help you with your math homework … hahahaha!"