Aspiring Tv Character Gifts

"Wow! This is just like the tv show I've spent my whole life emulating!"

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

'They all want to play the star.'

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

'Hey guys?. . . Help us think what Dale could do for his '15 minutes of fame.''

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

Directors chairs on movie set with Model, Actress, and Whatever on them

"Nobody at school will laugh at me."

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

"First let me say that your father and I really, really wanted to like your performance."

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

"I'm not sure I'd want fifteen minutes of fame. Mum would only follow it with fifteen minutes of criticism."

All our servers are locally caught from a sustainable source — the actors' academy across the street.

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

'Nothing doing folks, except ? surprise, surprise ? here's another for you, Desert Island Bloke.'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'I'm playing a crowd member in the Easter pageant. I was going to play Pilate 'til I found out I'd have to wash my hands.'

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

'Good lick with your future acting career. And just to give you an idea of how tough it is out there, here's a copy of 'Withnail and I'. The uncut version.'

"I promised myself I would never let this happen to me."

'I was only famous for 14 and a half minutes.'

"My parents are nice, school's going well, and I'm basically a good kid. Unfortunately, there's no money or fame in being normal."

"I consider it an honor just to be sitting with someone who's thinking of becoming an actress."

'Jeff! You need to keep one foot on the ground!'

Always stick to the script.

"Larry and Phil aren't sure what they want to do, but Michael is interested in show business."

Spin Dentistry...'Hollywood, here I come...'

Waiting to be discovered, or taken to work, whichever comes first...