Aspiring Speaker Gifts

"Now tell me more about your fear of speaking in front of an audience."

"Ambitions. . . To . . . Er. . . Um . . . Become. . . Er. . . Um. . . A. . . Er. . . Um . . . Motivational. . . Er. . . Um. . . Speaker."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"So...what are you doing after you graduate?"

Carmel Buildings, Portman Square: A temperance meeting.

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

Do you have to write the 5 paragraph essays to be a rich investment banker? Or rock star? Or famous actress? No. No. And no. Then why learn to write one? So when those jobs don't work out

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"This is a hell of a way to start a magazine."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

Presenter Auditions.

'It's my application to Harvard...'

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

"What made you start blogging about success?"

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"Nobody at school will laugh at me."

'I don't understand your question. Could you restate it as an answer?'

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'