Aspiring Advertiser Gifts

"Of course, we can't pay you. But just think of all the exposure you'll be getting!"

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

Director/Action Man toy.

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

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If nobody had invented graphics

Creative department

What else is there to wish for?

'But you know I don't have brand loyalty for anyone but you!'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

"I know it's misspelled, but market research shows that cute sells."

Direct Marketing...

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

"Follow that dream!" (man boarding taxi)

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

Sale. To do this job you just need to follow the old adage and "dance like nobody's watching"!

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

Infinity Tavern

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

Berries, Roots, Tubers, Stems, Leaves.

'Harold is the brains behind the Smudge-o-Rama mailer.'

"What these product ideas lack is a little bite."

Honesty in retail

The Doorway to Ideas

Gerald Ratner's return

Your Leaders Putting Words Into More Words

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"