Aspiring Advertiser T-Shirts

"Of course, we can't pay you. But just think of all the exposure you'll be getting!"

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

Director/Action Man toy.

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

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If nobody had invented graphics

Creative department

'But you know I don't have brand loyalty for anyone but you!'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

What else is there to wish for?

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

"I know it's misspelled, but market research shows that cute sells."

Direct Marketing...

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

"Follow that dream!" (man boarding taxi)

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

'Harold is the brains behind the Smudge-o-Rama mailer.'

Berries, Roots, Tubers, Stems, Leaves.

Honesty in retail

Frank's bar & grill & jukebox & pool table & chairs & bathroom & mechanical bull & tables & karaoke machine & drinking fountain & lamps & fire extinguisher & doors & floors...

". . . yes, sir, folks . . . and furthermore, folks . . . for real quality, folks . . . yes, sir, folks . . ."

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

"First, the disclaimer: I'm a doctor portraying an actor portraying a doctor."

'Edible food! Eeeeedible food!'

Your Leaders Putting Words Into More Words

Gerald Ratner's return