Advert Enthusiast Gifts

"Now just say the first thing that comes into your mind."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

Live fast, die young, leave a beautiful memory: 'Finger lickin' good, baby! Finger lickin' good!'

Why can't life be like a Taster's choice commerial

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Create some buzz!

Creative department

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

Important Food Groups

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

Roads with a view.

Eat Beef

"Ah yes, I know this bit...it's from the advert!"

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Gerald Ratner's return

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

Honesty in retail

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

News for Sale

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

Gullib-Os

Advertising and PR Agency: 'I'm able to spin at 60 words per minute, hype at 50 words and distort at 45 words.'

Opp'y of a Lifetime

"Here's the marketing department's solution."

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'