Advertising Enthusiasts Gifts

'Your ad here.'

'I've got an injury claim solicitor to advertise on your soles.'

'We'll have two glasses of your chardonnay with the most aggressive advertising campaign.'

"I can't pronounce the drug and I don't know the ailment, but the visuals make me happy."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Create some buzz!

If nobody had invented graphics

Creative department

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

Important Food Groups

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

"Hire me and I'll bring in orders. Big orders. You're gonna need a bigger door."

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

"How's this for transparency: Our product isn't organic but our bullshit advertising it!"

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Gerald Ratner's return

News for Sale

Eat Beef

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

Honesty in retail

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

Gullib-Os

Opp'y of a Lifetime

Advertising and PR Agency: 'I'm able to spin at 60 words per minute, hype at 50 words and distort at 45 words.'