Artistic Irony Lover Pillows

"Why do they think we've been shitting on him all these years?"

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"I thought it would be appropriate to have a band playing as we went down."

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

Right-thinking people against wrong-thinking people

'You keep turning them out and I'll dig a parking garage.'

'I want my lectures to have entertainment value.'

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

'You're proposing to me with, cubic zirconias?... But, you're a diamond dealer!'

Leaking Hudson River paintings.

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

Please help. Always in the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Of course no one wants a forest fire anywhere, anytime. It can be devastating. That's why I feel so guilty."

'I'm afraid Mr. Caldwell doesn't want to see you now. However, you're free to visit his web site.'

Peace bomb.

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

In 1682 in a remote cave in the Ural Mountains, Heinrick Glaston discovers irony.

"Oh sure, it's easy to blame your husband, when he's not here to defend himself."

Let's see...number 61...the painting's name is 'Calamity'.

"No worries. I'm well-prepped and ready for anything they might throw at me."

"When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one person to dissolve the marital bonds which have connected her with another..."

Perfection Troubleshootors.

Exhibition for Prisoners

An artist creates a sculpture of a "thumbs up" and is then crushed by it.

'I only make predictions in retrospect.'

'Someone come and mediate our argument about mediation!'

"I hope there's nothing genetically modified in this."

The Boss of the Kleptomania Clinic has turned up for work only to discover his Clinic has been stolen