Artful Monk Gifts

Whoa, easy on the details, brother! This may be shrunk down for an e-book someday.

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

"I'm going on a retreat."

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

Monk and Bible and Devil Page Marker

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

Running shoes? You have the wrong idea about "fasting," Brother Ernest!

"Many of us are worrying, Brother Daniel, that you've become too clothes conscious."

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Monks sitting at a row of computers typing up old-fashioned looking manuscripts.

"You're born, you deconstruct your childhood, and then you die."

'I wish Brother Gregory would spend less time surfing the 'net.''

'I invited God to be one of my friends on Facebook and he's turned me down!'

A monk illuminating a book with quill pen

Computer literate Monk

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Golf

'I'd still be in a luxurious office instead of a smelly cave if I really knew the secret of keeping customers.'

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

Pray as you Go.

Sports Day at the Monastery

'Today's sermon is from St. Matthew, Chapter Five....'

'I am not, metaphysically speaking, as loopy as you seem to believe.'

A monk watches TV in his zen garden.

'I keep mine on my IPod.'

Monk Synth Bell Ringers