Artful Humorist Gifts

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

"I'd like you to meet the artist."

"How do I get this cross hatching out?"

Dinosaur and mammoths, "He says he's not receding, it's just evolution."

"We've got to strike the setup. The patron wants organic."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Football Chameleon

"The Eggsorcist"

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Sock Puppet in Literature

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

battered artist has painted picture of falling bomb.

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

The opera - 'Please, sir, give us your ticket, if you ain;t a-goin' in again.'

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

"Pendleton, as of noon today your services will no longer be required. Meanwhile, keep up the good work."

"All this online learning sort of makes you miss the head lice days, huh?"

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

Gustav Holst

"....And the weatherman said it was going to be a hot one today so take it easy and stay hydrated..."

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

A dog dressed as a cowboy leans against a sign that reads "Armed response".

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'

"It's right here in the brochure: 'Be sure to tip your fishing guide.'"

"Oh, O.K. I can sort of see it."

Jackson Pollock - "Oh no! Someone's thrown paint all over it!"