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The Masters' Early Works.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

Convenience.

Rodin's Browser

Kid doing cave paintings

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

The Cremaster Cycle

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

Art Masters as Clowns pt. 2

""Stop fidgeting. This is supposed to be a still-life."

"She said it has a blistering fervency that reminds her of a slide."

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

"The museum of modern art on fire... an installation."

"Are my breasts AI? No! My cartoonist would never use AI!"

Mammoth Posing

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

Woman on psychiatrists couch talking to statue in art museum.

Giacometti's less famous 'Man Walking Dog'

Maria Sibylla Merian

After three days the curator decided it was probably upside down.

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

Clown Painting in Museum

"This exhibit made possible by Ugg and the generous donation of his cave."

"I can write, but I can't draw."

"Don't even think about it."