Art Buff Pillows

Tina Turner

'Is it a real Lichtenstein, Brad - or yet another parody?'

Hoxton map.

A stick figure evolving into a more realistic-looking man

The woman who donated all her culottes to the metropolitan museum of art.

"Thanks - it was so fabulously regional. I mean, I can't close my eyes without seeing fajitas and Georgia O'Keeffe."

Does this pen make me look fat?

The Death of Marat

'Hey, I'm a Border Collie. You'll have to fill it in.'

A finger painting a painting of a vase and flowers.

'Beg pardon sir, but that's the window. The plasma TV is over here.'

Monster in Bath

"Know anything funny I could turn into a cartoon?"

Showbiz Awards

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

"Now I really hate poetry."

'One eye of newt or two?'

Trump! The Musical

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

'It's a Joan Biro.'

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Mikado

Deflator mouse

A little bird told me...

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

Pearly King and Queen

The High Line at Giza

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

Picasso: The Early Years