Aristocracy Fan Gifts

Ladies' Mile

'King? Is that a nickname, like Duke Ellington or Queen Latifah?'

"It's said to be haunted by the ghost of the fifth earl, who fell on hard times."

'You can just forget about the cake.'

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

"The Duke and Duchess of A.T. & T., the Count and Countess of Citicorp, the Earl of Exxon, and the Marchioness of Avco. The Duke of Warnaco..."

'Burke's B-list celebrities.'

"This house has been in my family for a considerable period of time."

"Ted's been down in the dumps since they started giving greed a bad name."

"Can any of us truly see ourselves?"

Gentleman's Club Scene

"China Ministry of State Security Royal Infiltration Training Unit"

'New money or old money?'

cayetana de alba

The Duke of Earl meets the Earl of Duke:''Hey, baby, wot's happenin'!' 'Charmed!'

'He calls himself a philanthropist, but would prefer Lord Philanthropist.'

'Is the poodle of the house in?'

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

Duchess

"I may be your page today, but someday, I hope to be the whole book."

The Frozen Out Fox Hunter (Tobogganing)

Downtrodden Abbey

"So what are you the earl of?"

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

"Call me sentimental, but if I had to live my life all over again, I wouldn't change a thing."

"You think more of Football than you do of me!", "I think more of Earl Spencer than I do of you!!"

'Well it's a ransom, sire, but I wouldn't call it a King's Ransom...'

Queen

'That reminds me must buy an anniversary present for Lady Caroline!!'

So Sympathetic

The Nobility Scooter

Owner: 'Why didn't you ride as I told you? Didn't I tell you to force the pace early and come away at the corner?' Jockey: 'Yes m'Lord, but I couldn't very well leave the horse behind.'

"It's Parkins, sir; we're 'aving a bit of a time below stairs."

'Oh yes, everyone likes him, he's not intelligent enough to make enemies.'