Archaeology Lecturer Gifts

'Recent studies have demonstrated that what we believed were ritual sacrifices to Gods, were unsuccessful attempts to do breast implant surgeries."'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

'But I digress...'

Eternal Student.

'I told you it would be useful.'

The first car accident.

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

Tut and Carmen.

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

"Make a lot of money."

'That's about it so far, Son.'

A caveman paints from life

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

Interdisciplinary studies.

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"And this is our media room."

Scarcity

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

E=mc2.

Repurposing the aqueducts of Ancient Rome.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

Physician tending a mummy.

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'