Arachnophile's Dream Gifts

What really frightened Miss Muffet away,

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

"I think I'm in the wrong kind of spin class!"

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

Little Miss Muffet's Graduation.

"I won't bring any more friends home unless you let me play with them first!"

'Bernice . . . could you come in here please? Bring a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter!'

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

"Really Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!"

"Great location. Let's check it out."

'If you can read this, call the missing kids' hotline.'

Horror

"Don't kill it. The eat bugs."

'My mother is a black widow, my wife is a black widow...'

'He won't go back into his house until I check to make sure the spider is gone.'

'That's right! No huffing a puffing for 30 minutes on a treadmill. We've developed a new stress test that is faster and more accurate.'

'Honey, that spider's in the bath again!'

So how long have you had this fear of spiders ?

'You've been drinking again.'

After immobilising it's prey, the Tasmanian Death Spider prefers to suck out the innards with a bendy straw.

"I see spiders on Mars! Do you know what that means? "we need to send an exterminator?"

Spider Horror Movies

Lady reads book about beating phobias.

"You know humans eat eight of us in their sleep every year."

'Dang, I'm sick of telling stupid kids that I'm not radioactive and that even if I did bite them, they wouldn't become a superhero!'

After being frightened away too many times, Miss Muffett decided to rif herself of the spider.

'I hate you, Al.'

Judge about to hit spider with mallet.

"AA-ARGH!"

Arachnophobia training.

'Now, Mrs. Jenkins, I'm going to try a slightly different approach to deal with your fear of spiders!'

'On the other hand it does have a certain charm'

Shipwreaked man rejecting desert island because of a spider

Ever since he was a little magazine, he had been deathly afraid of spiders, and he didn't like where this was going,