Apology Aficionado Pillows

'To begin with, I'd like to apologise for my behavior at our recent meeting!'

'Sorry for being late, honey!'

'If it's any consolation, I'm sorry I blew my top this morning.'

'If you're not sorry then I'm not sorry. . .but if you're sorry then I'm sorry.'

Rail service excuses: Points failure.

"Of course I'm sorry for whatever it is I'm supposed to have done."

'It's too LATE for an apology!'

Department of Bureaucracy - 'Mistakes were made'...So we're hiring more apologists!

"I didn't mean to yell. I accidentally hit my caps lock button."

"Look, I said I was sorry. Quit digging up the past."

Sorry

Two Latin scholars exchange mea culpas.

'Can he call you back? He's rehearsing his apology!'

'I'm sorry for being fresh. It's what I do.'

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

'I've never met a professional apologist before!' 'I'm sorry!'

"I'm sorry, Arthur. I've decided to secede from our marriage."

'Apology accepted! Good day!'

"Sorry I didn't return your calls of earlier today."

I made fun of your age the other day. I'd like to apologize. That's odd. Does the blade of grass apologize to the lawnmower? Does the bug apologize to the windshield? Does the ant apologize to the boot? Those are some interesting analogies. Did they make more sense back in the middle ages when you first came up with them? I sense a boot coming

It's "mea culpa," Brother Ernest, not "my bad."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Sitting in a tree

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

Valentine Day

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

"Wow, what a DILF."

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

Love Birds love just being together

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

Sorry

You just keep giving.