Aphorism Lover T-Shirts

"Sorry, Tom, but when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail."

Reading my Critics

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"All a cat CAN do is strive for authenticity."

"We had a brainstorm - I hope it's a brainchild."

'Now I am become life, creator of worlds."

'I'd put it on the back burner, but the stove's been repossessed.'

Zoo. Diet Clinic. Hey everybody --- There's no longer an 800-pound gorilla in the room!

"Moulting"

Conference on the Control of Time and Space. Left to Right: Isaac Newton, Aristotle, HG Wells, Ptolemy,Isaac Asimov, Albert Einstein, Galileo, Copernicus.

Scurile travels

"You know what I think, babe? Seven on the Richter scale."

"As Maggie Thatcher once said: 'Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.'"

'I'm a fat cat in a dog-eat-dog world.'

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

When Tia Carmen says... "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner" it means "I can fix it with a hammer."

A Poem about Sand

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

'Isn't that wonderful? We both suffer from intellectual angst!'

Out of control

"Honestly, I thought you were a metaphor."

'Are we watching business news or sports news?'

"I'm searching for a happy medium between sitting on a mountain top and eating cheese fries."

"Today's sermon will be followed immediately by a rebuttal from the opposition."

'The Meaning of Life? -- you don't have a bad ticker, do you?'

'Have you been working out?'

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

Rats deserting a sinking ship