Anxious Reader Pillows

Fear of news.

"Feel free to imagine you might have any of the conditions you read about in the magazines."

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!'

"It's all show-as soon as Marks gone he switches off the football and reads Proust..."

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

'I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've babbled since I turned left on red.'

Man reading in lamp

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

Agoraphobic Explorer

"Is it okay that I said yes to that costume party?"

'But what if the author doesn't want to meet us?'

"My life is a powerful blast tocenter field easily snagged on the warning track."

The Tell-Tale Heart 2: Lost Phone On Vibrate

"Just get out there and be yourself – or better yet, someone like me."

'She will not call on me, she will not call on me, she. . .'

"Did we switch everything off before we left?"

Person is hiding behind book entitled 'Coping with shyness'.

Worry about everything that might happen/Me/Be ready for nothing that does happen.

'What if I want to stop? Where's the pause button?'

"Is that Baldo's 'scary Halloween' face?"

"Are there any careers where I won't get replaced by an app?"

Fear of frying.

Someone is always trying to force me to have more fun in my life phobia: 'Can you recommend someplace where nothing is expected of us? Wilbur can't stand pleasure of any sort.'

"Anyway, all you'll need to worry about soon is which direction the wind is blowing."

'So, the paper's a little messed-up after I've been reading it ... big deal!'

'You need to go for a walk, but they can't find your leash! You start to panic...'

"By your powers combined, I am going outside."

A family hides from the TV news.

"Strike three, strike three! Please, God, strike three!"

"Don't worry, in the case of an accident the pilot is the first on the scene."

Man runs from self-help book called 'Feel the Fear and Run Away.'

"This retail therapy isn't working for me."