Anxious Pet Owner Gifts

Don't Get Involved...

'Fetch.'

Biofelineism

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

Cat in Tree.

'Who wants to be examined first?'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'You're doing that just to bug me, aren't you?'

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

"Now I'm sure that, at this point, you're wondering HOW I can remove the anal sacs..."

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

he used to belong to a cartoonist

"That was the pet store, dear - they want to know if you've noticed any minor flashes of aggression in Joey since starting the steroid bird feed?"

'If you don't notice an improvement after a few weeks, we can try a different cone.'

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

'And this is scraps.'

'Walking your pet amoeba again, Henry?'

'Hey Joe!...Me? Oh,nothing much,just out walking the fish.And you?...'

'Last year's 'Bring your pet to work day' turned out very well.'

'No, that isn't my slippers either! Try again.'

Zack Brillard and Live-In Companion

'I'm sure he thinks he's a parrot!'

"We’re trying to inject a little pastoralism into our lives."

'It's the only way I can wash him.'

"Such a cute little thing-what do you call it?"

'When you said you were a bee keeper...'

'Russell, it's not necessary to take the goldfish out for a walk.'

"I'm more of an 'I like to watch' dog."

'I'm not an indoor cat. I'm a bitter, angry, frustrated, resentful, repressed cat.'

"I know they're treating you kindly but are they treating you ethically?"

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'