Anxiety Laughter Seeker Pillows

'I'm sure I left the gas on!'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Bad fake tan day.

"That'll be five bucks."

The only time cats are known to laugh.

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

"Tom, I’d like you to meet Chris. Chris is better than you."

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"What did Jesus order?"

Wet Cement. Always the joker, aren't you, Ernie?

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"Projectile hairballing."

Drunk Barber

"Why don't I clang some utensils, make 3 grilled cheese sandwiches and we call it an early night?"

"Hey! Get back here!"

he used to belong to a cartoonist

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

Football heads...

Bald Man Overcomb

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

Ask Sadie

Comedy Store - Canned Laughter delivery.

When Stupid People Get an Idea