Antiquity Admirer Gifts

'I think I'm going to watch this in rog's cave. His cave drawings are in HD.'

Saint Paul in a Roman prison cell with Onesimus.

'Professor Moogwan has been here simply for ages.'

Antiques. Special on Low-Def.

Souvenirs.

Antique shop owner looks at old chalice, saying: 'Well, it MIGHT be worth something if it had the original myrrh inside.'

"I'm putting everything into Empire bonds. What can possibly happen to the Roman Empire?"

"Tut's outdone himself this time."

"There's no other way to put this. . . You're all history."

"You're right, professor, this wouldn't be just any birthday!"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

Sundial Time

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

Trojan Hurdler.

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Antiques

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

'Look! There's a Zyzzkzkk!'

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

'We'll have to redesign it. Whenever the Pharoah's wife tries to sunbathe on the roof, she slides off.'

Posh Easter Egg

'They never quite finished it - it was probably over budget.'

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

How they did it . . .

'We started the extension then the property market collapsed.'

Teddy Roosevelt

Cave Paintings Audio Guide

Egyptian Mummy/Egyptian Mummy and Toddler.

"Cheer up, grod, these are the good old days."

'What do you mean we can't finish on time? Do you want history to say that Rome wasn't built in a day?'