Anti-tech Club Member T-Shirts

This way to Utopia. . . No cell or wifi reception here.

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

'I hate Mondays.'

"Dear diary...Well at least I'm not having to watch the Oscars."

The anti-social network: 'Hey Jeffrey...I need help setting up my dad's anti-social network.'

"What next?" "Don't tell me."

The Lost Tribe

A man looks out a newly made window, while a smashed TV lies on the ground

"Anywhere that doesn't have TVs, computers, radios, ipods, cellphones or video games."

The Ungooglable Man

Analog Alzheimer - Digital Dementia

Family Tree DNA Test

'Here's trouble, it's the militant wing of the Philatelic Society!'

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

Red indians kept in touch with home without the aid of mobile phones.

"I'm meeting with Thor for drinks. He doesn't zoom.

'Nothing to worry about, Dear, just a little accident on the information superhighway.'

Man in cell phone shop - 'Do you have a phone that just phones?'

E-mail

"When your computer is locked up, lady, you should call your computer's customer service, not a locksmith!"

Are you ever worried people will see all the stuff you put online? Not at all … because I don't put anything online. I'm not on Facebook, I'm not on Twitter, and I conduct all my business in person so they can be charmed by the twinkle in my mustache. You are looking at a man who's totally off the grid, little buddy. It's like talking to a Neanderthal. I also shave with a razor-sharp sliver of granite my grandfather bequeathed unto me.

Ye Olde Book Shoppe

"As a protest against the tyranny of technology, I refuse to upgrade my phone."

Prisoner of technology.

"Just sitting here waiting for Facebook to go away."

'Bob's served the company as man and boy, and as cantankerous old moaner who doesn't understand IT.'

"You're dropping by since you're in the neighborhood? Hey, that's great. Unfortunately, we're in our car and, whoa, looks like we're heading into a tunnel. Gotta go. Bye."

Mobile Bans

"He loves reading, hates digital technology, and cares for the planet, so has decided to go paperless."

'She is not Amish, we just wont buy her a cell phone.'

Sorry. Only people who didn't spend their whole lives online get a "participation" medal.

"I'm through with smart phones. My girlfriend broke up with me in a text, my teacher flunked me in an email, and my mom grounded me on Facebook."

Gas guzzler.

'I take it you're not an advocate of social networking whilst shopping.'