Anti-fashionista Pillows

'I'd rather be wearing a plain white t-shirt.'

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

"The weatherman said dress for the mid 70's. Bob was elated." "Much. Too. Sexy."

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

"Jeepers creepers! It's Madonna, but it's you, too, Margaret."

As Seen Watching TV

Pizza and Karaoke

"We're trying to give geriatrics a sexier image..."

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

Strange man has a nose monocle.

'This associate has a first rate mind...and a third rate suit.'

Rock and roll singer with old mike and three backing singers.

Wild and crazy salmon

Salad Hat

"What do you consider your most attractive feature and what are you doing about it?"

'At least we don't have to worry about getting those as gifts.'

"Someone's been sending me J. Crew catalogues."

"The only joints we roll these days are our ankles."

'I never thought YOU'D go punk, Rapunzel.'

'Sorry, I'm not disturbing you, am I?' (Man has tattoos, piercings, Satan on forehead)

"I thought tonight we're gonna party like it's 1969."

Bell Bottoms

'In my day, son, men didn't have rings through their noses until after they were married.'

Er! Exactly when was this 'dress for success' book you've been readng written?

Dad Socks / Dad Sex

'When they go around dressed like that, they're just looking for trouble!'