Anti-consumerism Advocates Pillows

"I just worry that we won't be able to provide the same level of crap that our parents gave us."

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

Woman thinking about luxuries.

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

"I proclaim this sun-drenched tropical country a new tourist mecca, in the names of Consolidated Airways and the Peck & Smathers Advertising and Public Relations Company."

Woman impulsively buying a book about how to stop impulse buying.

"I just got a Trump alert with my discount code off my next purchase of Trump baseball caps."

Black Friday

desert isle shopping trolley...

"It's just not the same."

"... And that's an 18-pound piece of tofu I shot at Whole Foods."

"I'm sure you want little Jimmy to have a complete set of 'Muscular Heroes of the Cosmos,' now, don't you, Mr. Bennett?"

New From The People Who Brought You I-Can't-Believe-It's-Not-A-Petroleum-By-Product Sandwich Spread

'The good news is, I got your Mum's cardigan.'

"I'm going out to keep consumer spending in line with Wall Street expectations."

Instant Gratification service desk (with a long queue and delay)

"Sales of our festive toilet cleaner have gone through the floor...it makes you worry that people have forgotten what the festive season is ALL ABOUT!"

It's a new year, little buddy. What are you going to do to make the most of it? Throw out the old to make room for the new. Very deep, little buddy. I'm a deep person. If the big-screen tv I got on Black Friday is a whole month old, I'm Zen enough to just breathe ... and let it go, on eBay. Want to hear my Zen mantra? Luckily, I stopped listening 30 seconds ago.

"I balance my manic compulsive buying with manic buyer's remorse."

"Actually, take us to your gift shop first."

Visit Our Gift Shop

"'Take that,' growled the writer as the buyer for Borders slumped to the ..."

"I admire their honesty -- I'll take six."

"Not much to look at, but it was a real bargain at the Gene Depot."

"Sellouts."

"That's a nice little book. It didn't waste too much of my time."

"Honey, they just can't resist it."

"My salary is struggling to keep pace with the empty bottomless pit of my greed."

Capitalism is a Form of Totalitarianism

"Honestly, Kate—can you picture us in a shopping mall?"

Barcode Baby

Cornucopia Prime

"excuse me...what town am i in..?"