Animal Welfare Officer Pillows

'...Do not feed the bears'

"Ms. Hoffman, we're from the SPCA investigating allegations of animal cruelty. Is it true that you force your small dog to wear holiday sweaters?"

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

Humans...What is their purpose?

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

Support group for sheep.

Foster failure

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Endangered wildlife 'Lost' posters stuck on trees surrounded by rubbish

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"We’re a lending aquarium."

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

The Golfing Accident

"Be kind"

'Is it guilt that when you eat us that we are no longer called pigs but bacon, pork chops or ham?'

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

'Why is it he never understands sit , stay or down, but understands spayed and neutered?'

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

"This is why I want you to remember the three most important words in the world: spay, neuter, adopt."

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

'I know I'm not a kitten, I know I'm sorta fat, But if you will adopt me, I'll be your lovin' cat.' Caption:Shelter Cat Blues

'We've tried everything else without success and have now made the decision to adopt.'